by | Sep 29, 2021 | Sanatana Dharma, Traditions

What if I told you that the word Kanyamaan, instead of Kanyadaan
objectifies women ?

What if I told you that the word Kanyamaan is directly symbolic to dowry instead of feminism ?

Kanyadaan is putramaan..


1 – “Women are not money to be given in daan..”

The word Daan has nothing to do with money.

Consider the words like विद्यादान and प्राणदान ।

दान is done by giving something that is प्रिय to giver. That’s all. Daan is a
symbol of exchange of love.

2 – “What is the bride, if not money ? Why is she called Lakshmi ?”

दुल्हन is महालक्ष्मी , groom is नारायण ।

Wife is लक्ष्मी ।

लक्ष्मी means अक्षरा – that wealth whose क्षर never occurs I.e. which never

महालक्ष्मी is that source of लक्ष्मी which


does not decrease or shrink after giving out Lakshmi.

( If you will take a drop of water from someone’s bucket, his bucket’s
volume will decrease.

But if you will take a drop of water from Lord Varuna, the drop will still
remain in water cycle and Varun a’s glory won’t perish)


३ – “If the bride is Mahalakshmi, how can her family possess them as
property ?”

They can’t, and they don’t.

Women are said to be ‘ प्रकृति ‘ in scriptures.

प्र + कृति = best creation (of God)

Only Vishnu ‘possesses’ women in metaphorical sense.


4 – “If human beings can not possess women, how can they do their daan

They don’t.

Kanyadaan is the only daan ritual in which the giver does not say ना माम or
‘this is not mine’

In यज्ञ or charity, the giver hands over money and says “this money is not
mine anymore”

Understand symbols –

If father is not present in a religious ceremony, paternal uncle is taken as
symbolic to father, right ?

In navgrah pooja, pulses are taken as symbol of grah (planets).

Parents are mere symbols in this daan…

Kanyadaan is DAAN OF seed of WHOLE to aid birth of a new, more refined
seed (suryoday)

What can be more प्रिय than Gotra ?

That is exactly why Kanyadaan is Mahadaan !

कन्यादानं महादानं सर्वदानेषु दुर्लभ, तदैव योगेन त्वं गृहाण वरोत्तमं ।

5. “if they don’t possess women, how are they doing daan ?”

Kanyadaan is a DUTY of the whole family, given by Vishnu and all the Pitr of
the lineage – many of whom are serving in Vishnulok as great rishis.

The father increases PUTRAMAAN of the groom’s Father by doing this duty.

6. “Are parents casting away and getting rid of the daughter by giving her
away like that ?”

I repeat, Kanyadaan is the ONLY DAAN in which the giver does NOT
DISOWN responsibilities.

That is exactly why Kanyadaan is accompanied by 7 Phere or 7 vows done in
witness of family.

7. “Why not Kanyamaan ?”

Because of grammar.

The suffix मान is जड़ or rigid.

मूर्तिमान – सरदार वल्लभ भाई पटेल की स्मृति statue of unity में मूर्तिमान है। परंतु वो
वहां जीवित रूप से नहीं हैं ।

कन्यामान – “possessing the quality of being Kanya”

This does not make any sense

8. “What if we add dynamic element to the word Kanyamaan by tweaking it
grammatically ?”

Then it would mean, “exhibition of quality of being Kanya” and the word
‘exhibition’ would imply family’s maan as a whole by virtue of religious

In other words,

A. Kanyamaan ceremony would objectify women

B. And it would encourage vanity in celebration of marriage function

C. And the family would be religiously bound to pay dowry to prove their
approval of ritual of maan.